Was Raising Children a Personal Negative?

In the current edition of Atlantic Monthly, Paul Bloom dissects the issue of whether a person is composed of multiple selves. The article is stimulating. We recognize that each of us has a "self" that is relatively more virtuous than a "self" that is grossly selfish. Jung theorized the self as having a shadow as well as the more positive image that we show the world.

In the article, the author zoned in on the dichotomy between one's stated perception of parenthood compared with true feelings:

if you ask people about their greatest happiness in life, more than a third mention their children or grandchildren, but when they use a diary to record their happiness, it turns out that taking care of the kids is a downer—parenting ranks just a bit higher than housework, and falls below sex, socializing with friends, watching TV, praying, eating, and cooking.

It caused me to consider my own experience. While I admit that there were moments that tested me, my experience was positive, but possibly for a different reason.

While I appreciated my children as people that were "mine", I realized that parenthood was important for me to become a person. I looked upon parenthood somewhat as a remedy to my ineptitudes and deficiencies. My children were tutors for me to develop into a person I became (of course, they could question how well they served that role!). At any rate, parenthood made me a better person (probably not saying much!) and I appreciated what they did for me. For good or bad, they can take credit for what I became!