I rode to my first parish in Concord, MA in 1963. Everything was admittedly new, but nothing causing concern. Within a short time, maybe a week or two, the doorbell rang and I came to answer it. A woman wanted to talk and went into the office. She quickly voiced her question why she could not practice birth control. After taking a breath resulting from the pointed question, I voiced the moral theology taught repeatedly in the seminary. She was not moved and contested what I was saying. The conversation eventually ended with my feeling sorry that I could not convince her.
To my utter surprise, she cam back within two weeks to continue the discussion, resulting in the same outcome. I felt badly for not being able to “set her straight”, but felt justified in what I said.
In a matter of another week or two, a middle agreed male parishioner wanted to talk to me. He was a teacher in a Catholic school and had, as I recall, five children. For whatever reason, he too wanted to discuss the church’s position on birth control. This time, though, the issue was not what the church’s position was, but rather to “educate” me that the church’s position was wrong. In great detail, he cited all sorts of reasons why the church’s position was not only outdated, but wrong.
I don’t recall the details of the conversation, but I surely remember how different I became virtually overnight.
I started to become involved with other clergy in the town, Episcopalian and Jewish. Talking with them about whatever allowed me to see their wisdom. I started then to question other views of the Catholic Church. Before long, it became clear that I was a problem. I recall my fellow curate telling me while having coffee in the kitchen, “Ed, you are clearly a sincere priest, but you are under the control of the devil!”
Admittedly, that caught my attention.
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